DamnYankeee.com

Just in case no one knows, DamnYankeee is a HUGE Lost fan and tonight is the night we all bid adieu to season 4. What is going to happen? Will someone die? Damn, I can’t wait for 9 pm to get here. In typical Lost fashion, you know damn straight the writers will once again leave us having to pick our jaws up off the floor then have to wait till next season to figure out what the hell happened.

For the first time ever, I plan on watching the finale as it air’s so hopefully tomorrow, I will have my thoughts on what transpired… well, unless my life gets suddenly exciting and I go out. I don’t see that happening.

Please feel free to discuss what YOU think could possibly happen. I think that the end will be the moving of the island. Someone will definitely die, which I hope think will be Charlotte (what use does she have anyway?).. which would be cool with me, I don’t want any of the Lostie’s to die. I think we will also find out what who the hell is Richard. Jesus, I’m going to drive myself crazy..

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NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM LOL NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM

I love it!

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Thank God for female friends, family members. Every once in a while I will happen to come and visit you right when the mailman delivers the holy grail of what every adolescent teenage boy knows as his best friend. The Victoria’s Secret catalog… which is why I decided on Adriana Lima. Words cannot express just how hot she is.. Good God.

Adriana, DamnYankeee salutes you…

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So, like every other 30 something male, not only did I look forward to the 3 day ’s of lonliness weekend but I was also looking forward to delving back into the ‘Dr. Jones’ type thinking for the first time in 19 years. This time around Indiana is messing around in the rain forest which should always mean a lot of fun and excitement. ‘Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’, for me, started off pretty slow. I mean, the credits came on and the opening score gave me goosebumps, but after that it fell flat. I know, I was pretty pissed about it. I’d rather no Indy, then a shitty Indy. So, as I sat there thinking to myself “maybe I’ll name it something else so it won’t ruin the series for me”, did I notice a spike of interest. Then another… and another. It started to get pretty entertaining. I don’t know if I would call it Indiana Jones yet but it was definitely getting pretty good. THANK GOD.

There were some moments in the movie where I was like “Seriously, this is ridiculous”, luckily, there were only 2 of those and the high points, for me, definitely outweighed the silliness. There were plenty Indiana Jones trademarks scenes which without, would have really sucked. Overall I was entertained, thank god.

I definitely left the theater feeling pretty happy about it and I WOULD definitely see it again. Shit, just for the music alone! I definitely recommend it, it’s not the best Indiana Jones movie but it holds it’s own.

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Well guys, if you have had any of these toys growing up you could already be or could have been gay… Seeing the number one spot is worth the watch alone. I am sure you know someone who had this!

Check out the video here!

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Ok, so I have spent many hours waiting for you to don your black string bikini one more time. Kate Austen, you have never made so many men wish they were in a plane crash, trapped on an island as much as you do. I would pick the sand out of the crack of my ass for eternity for you. I just thougt you should know that. At least I know I have two more years to fantasize about you.

Babe of the Week

Evangeline Yankeee Lilly

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Ok, seriously guys. I, like all of you loved Borat. Now, I have always thought that it was an over exaggeration of how things are in some countries in Europe. I WAS WRONG.. DEAD WRONG. You have got to see this video! It is freaking hysterical. Make sure you watch the whole thing.. SERIOUSLY!!! One of the funniest things I have ever seen!

Click here for the video!

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I think the purpose of this device is self-explanatory. I just don’t know how much I would be willing to get under the car to do something..

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by David Siegel

Stomach: Cool, he’s napping. That’s good, I need all the energy I can get to work on those two crunchwrap supremes he just plopped down here.

Colon: Sorry, gotta do my ‘thang.

Stomach: Colon! You just woke him up! I’m not even halfway done with this yet. Whatever, sounds like he’s up and about now. You’re trigger-happy, Colon. It’s not safe!

Colon: Sorry.

Stomach: What’s that, Skin? He’s in the shower? Sounds good. Whadaya say, Balls? He’s using a lot of soap? Nice!

Balls: I know!

(splash)

Stomach: What the hell? A beer? A freezing-ass beer in the shower? Whatever it’s just one, but really?

Stomach: Margaritas and nachos? Are you making this a theme day or something? Bladder, heads up. Looks like we’re in a friggin’ Mexican restaurant on margarita night.

Bladder: 10-4, good buddy.

Stomach: What the HELL am I supposed to do with all these beans, guy? You think I’ve got a machine down here turning re-fried beans into stardust? Those grumbles are me saying to chill out! And Colon, don’t you get any ideas.

Colon: I’m fine. Shut up.

Stomach: Wow, I’m struggling. I’m begging for a nice nap, but from what Nose tells me we’re in a dive bar. I just hope I don…JAGER SHOT! JAGER SHOT! Alert! Alert! Set condition one and seal all emergency hatches! Looks like he’s getting shitfaced, everyone!

Penis: Yeah!

Balls: Alright!

Stomach: Bladder, you’re doing great. We’re working together like gears in a Swiss watch. I set em’ up, you knock em’ down. I passed off most of the heavy lifting to Intestines. Colon is keeping up his end of the deal. We’re cool. I just hope…JAGER SHOT! JAGER SHOT! Damn that one really shook…we can’t keep taking hits like this!

Eyes: Everyone, are you seeing all these babes? These girls look awesome!

Penis: Alright!

Balls: Yeah!

Stomach: Shake it off, you three! That’s the third pitcher talking and you know it! Hold it together! He’s switching to whiskey!

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